How To Be More Vulnerable In Your Writing

REAL QUICK: I’m putting on a 10-Day LinkedIn posting sprint with dozens of other creators starting on August 28th. We’ve had hundreds of creators join us and generate MILLIONS of views on LinkedIn since 2021. Consider joining us right here for this latest cohort.

There’s things I don’t write about. There’s thoughts in my head that don’t make it to paper.

My most recent story was a more vulnerable one, but I’d had those thoughts for a while — why didn’t I write about it?

Well, because I hate being vulnerable as much as anybody else. Because I’m a brand. Because I’ve semi-graduated past being a writer to being a business.

Back in the day when I had 0 followers I didn’t have to care about what I wrote because nobody was reading anyway.

Now every word I write is read by thousands — there’s a lot of pressure associated with that.

So, How Do You Get Over It, Tom?

The answer to the above question?

Well, to arrive at an answer we have to figure out why certain people are afraid of being vulnerable..

First Things First

Look, I’m really not that scared to publish posts anymore. Some people are horrified at the thought of posting one story per month to their blogs (which is fine), but I must say this doesn’t faze me at all.

And I think this has honestly come from experience.

When I first started writing, I was like a kid easing his way into the pool at the shallow end.

Now I don’t mind taking a big leap off the diving board every time I sit down to write.

I just don’t mind writing and being vulnerable that much — I still struggle with some things, sure, but not on the level of most other bloggers.

I’ve received the most disturbing comments you could imagine, been ridiculed in front of hundreds of thousands of viewers, and had posts go all night without receiving a single view.

In short, I’ve gotten used to a lot of crap online.

The nightmares you have about blogging? I’ve had all of them come true, and guess what?

It really doesn’t suck as much as you think.

“I’m Afraid Of What Other People Will Think Of Me”

This is OKAY. I am too. I’m about to spend the next year of my life talking to a camera everywhere I go. If that doesn’t shout “this guy is super, super weird,” I don’t know what does.

But you have to get over this.

How do you get over this?

Imagine your audience is sitting there reading in their underwear.

No, wait, that’s not it.

Here’s how you get over it.. Realize people don’t care as much as you think they do.

We all think there’s a spotlight following us everywhere we go, and this is the furthest thing from the truth.

Sometimes my avid readers ask me questions about a topic that was covered in a very recent blog post. Bless them for asking, and I’m okay with them asking, but I’m just using this to show you that people really don’t pay as much attention as you think — even when they LOVE reading your stuff.

People skim, people leave, people miss things.

Here’s another way to get over this..

Life Isn’t A Competition

Stop trying to outcompete everybody else by not showing vulnerability.

Life isn’t a competition. You don’t get a medal when you’re about to die for being “better” than everyone else.

Everybody gives so much of a fuck about status and I’m sick of it.

Who has the better car? The hotter partner? The bigger house? The better plan?

Stop caring about it.

Divorce yourself from that notion in the blogging world. Your calling is 1,000 times more meaningful in this world.

You’re here to tell the truth — something that’s drastically missing from society these days — and your truth could help other people.

Speaking of which..

You Could Be Helping Somebody

If your post truly touched the life of one human being on this planet, would you write it?

Of course you fucking would. Sorry for the language, but I think I need to shake some people up here.

Words are needed. Healing is needed in this world. Your vulnerability could save someone’s life. Sometimes the words we read from a stranger on the internet can do 1,000 times more for us than the words of our father or mother.

We need you to write.

This is about so much more than yourself. When you truly start to see writing as a tool that could move mountains for just one person, everything will change.

Even if nobody emails you saying you saved their life, even if you don’t get any comments, it doesn’t matter.

Who knows what impact you had?

Simply putting your honest thoughts out there for the world is the most honorable thing you could do. I’m serious.

You’re trying. You’re here. You’re standing on your own two feet and trying to empower others through your vulnerability.

I salute you.

“I’m Afraid To Get Nasty Comments From People”

This is an easy fear to remedy.

You’re going to get nasty comments either way. Even when you’re not being vulnerable — some person will light you up for the sake of lighting you up.

This is okay.

Hater’s comments are good — they show you’re capable as a writer of striking a nerve with people.

Wear these comments — and really every comment — as a badge of honor and continue being yourself.

“I’m Afraid That Somebody I Know Will Read It”

This is an understandable fear, but honestly this never happens.

I write three posts per week. I can’t tell you the last time my Dad read an article of mine.

Nobody cares what you’re posting — some will, and that’s fine — but if you don’t post your story on Facebook, you should be fine.

It’s incredible how many loved ones don’t read my posts. Like, I’m not sure what they think I do all day?

Take it from a writer who’s written over 500 blog posts, you don’t need to worry about this.

Divorce Yourself From Your Ego

The biggest thing is you need to divorce yourself from your ego.

And I’m not saying everybody reading has a big ego — but every human being does have some semblance of one.

We want to be better than other people, we don’t want to be picked last, we don’t want to be known as the person who did this or the person who did that.

Whatever.

Want to call me the guy who cheated on his girlfriend? Fine.

I don’t care.

I wrote that story to show others what they shouldn’t do. I wrote that story to comfort others who have done the same. I wrote it for a lot of reasons.

Perhaps the greatest thing writing has ever given me is confidence. I’ve actually grown more confident in myself as I bare all to the world.

I’m much more level-headed, I don’t get angry that easily, and I live my life with little to no stress on most days.

I do what I want, sure, but I think most of my calmness comes from the fact that I write what’s eating away at my heart instead of leaving it bottled inside.

And people have been super receptive to that, and to me.

We’re all looking for truth and realness in this world — make no mistake. That’s the number one thing that most people are looking for I think. That’s, in turn, why people read on the internet — they know they’ll get honesty there because readers don’t actually “know” the author.

When you’re honest in your posts, people flock to it 100 times faster than anything else because we want to know we’re not alone.

We want to feel better about ourselves, and by reading the honest thoughts of another — a writer who was willing to “bring themselves down a notch” to so many others in the name of truth — they were capable of lifting others up in the process.

And that, my friends, is the biggest reason you shouldn’t be afraid to be vulnerable.

REAL QUICK: I’m putting on a 10-Day LinkedIn posting sprint with dozens of other creators starting on August 28th. We’ve had hundreds of creators join us and generate MILLIONS of views on LinkedIn since 2021. Consider joining us right here for this latest cohort.